HopeForYourFamily

If you are not familiar with MySpace, you are out of the loop. If you are a parent of children under the age of 25 or so, and you are not familiar with MySpace…Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200. Stop right now and take time to get educated. A good parent tutorial is available through the National Institute on Media and the Family, a source I highly recommend for equipping parents and families on a wide range of media/family related issues. Another great resource for research based information and recommendations regarding families, entertainment, and health is the Henry J. Kaiser Family Foundation. A third excellent resource is the Center for Parent/Youth Understanding. But encouraging you to familiarize yourself with this huge online community is not really the point of today’s post. I want to share some reflections/lessons I have taken from my experience of MySpace (not actually having a MySpace page myself).

1. Our young people are desperate for relationships. Just look at the size of the “friends” list on the typical MySpace page, and how quickly it grows in the course of a month. Parents and other mentors, this is a great opportunity for us! Provided you approach them with a genuine love and acceptance for who they are, and a healthy respect for the importance of their friends in their lives, your children really are thirsty for a relationship with you. Don’t be intimidated by the electronic gadgetry of their lives. Be there.

2. Music is so personal and important in the lives of our young people. Spend any time navigating the waters of MySpace, and you will hear an amazing array of musical styles, themes, and expressions. Listen to the music. Hear the words of the songs (www.azlyrics.com is a helpful resource). Feel the emotions. Like it or not, this is the expression of their hearts and lives. Don’t just dismiss it or condemn it. Take it to heart, and let it lead you closer to the hearts of the young people you love.

3. Young people are willingly making their lives “open books.” The question is…will we invest the time it takes to read them?

4. Young people are spending vast amounts of time online. Look at how much work is put into MySpace pages, and how constant the dialog is on the message boards. Although I recognize there are multiple reasons for the growing obesity epidemic in America, particularly among young people, spending hours a day online has got to be a big factor.

5. Young people are creating their own world, language, and view of life - and it is a whole other reality from the general adult culture. For a much deeper, and not particularly pleasant, insight into this phenomenon, read “Hurt: Inside the World of Today’s Teenager” by Chap Clark.

6. YOUNG PEOPLE NEED YOU! There is no better place to invest your time and energy than in our children and adolescents - and you don’t have to stop with your own. They need us to be there for them, loving and guiding and accepting and challenging and believing in them. Many are literally dying for us to invest in them. When you have a few minutes, and you are ready to be inspired, check out www.makeadifferencemovie.com (OK, the music and narrator’s voice are a little cheesy and may remind you of “Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handy,” but don’t let that keep the story from inspiring you.)

With Hope - Always,

Roger

Parents of adolescents, how many of you enjoy your children’s favorite music - if you can even understand it?  I realize there are families in which parents and children enjoy the same musical tastes.  However, for many, the choice of music preference can become not only a difference between generations, but even a focal point of major misunderstanding and conflict.  I would urge you, as parents, to give serious consideration to what I am sharing today.  With the right approach, you can take the huge barrier of your teen’s musical identity and turn it into an open doorway into the deep struggles, hopes, fears, beliefs, and desires lying in the heart and mind of your son or daughter.

Music has always been important to people.  It has the power to touch and stir our spirits in a unique and powerful way, giving voice to our inner thoughts and shaping our identities in the process.  In modern America, each generation had their music that defined them and expressed their inner selves outwardly for all to hear - much of it commonly shared by the majority of one’s generational peers.  However, in postmodern adolescent America, music has become a much more personal expression - with scores of styles, genres, and subgenres available for download.  And let’s face it, much of today’s music (but certainly not all!) is distasteful, offensive, or outright disturbing to the parent who can pick out enough words to hear the themes.  So, what do you do when confronted with shocking album covers, myspace pages, cds, and downloads?

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If you are a parent, step-parent, teacher, childcare worker, or anyone who has a heart for raising children, and you live near the Baton Rouge area, you really should register today for “Parenting in the 21st Century.”  The event is THIS WEEKEND, on Friday night and Saturday (January 19-20) at First Presbyterian Church in downtown Baton Rouge.  Featured speakers include John Rosemond (nationally syndicated parenting columnist and author of several best-selling parenting books), Jill Rigby (Baton Rouge’s own nationally recognized parenting expert and author), Eva Marie Everson (author of “Sex, Lies, and the Media” and “Sex, Lies, and High School.”, Debbie Ward (North America Director of MotherWise), and more.  The cost is very reasonable, at $40/individual or $70/couple.  For more information, or to register, click here.  I would also encourage you to pass on this information to anyone else who might benefit from this great opportunity.

I’m going to speak very personally here, rather than try to lump you in with me.  Busy signals drive me nuts.  Ever hear of call waiting?!  Even worse is that person living in the stone age that doesn’t have an answering machine.  The phone just rings and rings.  Aren’t they afraid they will miss a call?  Don’t even get me started on automated message systems and phone trees at businesses.  And what about those folks afraid to get email?  We’re in the 21st century.  Get connected, already!   With all of our wireless, integrated, cellular, satelite, online, hi-def, digital, interactive telecommunications technology, how could anyone be unavailable whenever I need to get in touch with them?!?…

…Well, maybe it’s because they are more concerned with taking better care of themselves than in satisfying my urge for immediate attention.  Maybe they are taking care of someone or something more important than my present demands.  Maybe they aren’t doing anything…and that’s exactly what they need to be doing at the moment.

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Parents of young children, take note: NBC has added two programs to their new Saturday morning lineup that are expressly Christian in their message!  Tune in to your NBC affiliate at 9:00 am on Saturday to catch the very popular “Veggie Tales.”  The storytelling, silly songs, moral message, and good times are very engaging to children as they help teach them the right things to believe and do in real-life situations - based on the Word of God.  Then at 10:00, be sure to check out either “3-2-1 Penguins!” or “Larry Boy,” which are set to share the half hour time slot.  These programs are a bit more dramatic and adventurous than “Veggie Tales,” but also serve to teach healthy Christian morals to children.  I would strongly encourage you and your family to make the most of this entertainment/educational opportunity.  Watch the shows with your kids.  Talk with them during and after the programs about what they have seen.  How do they relate to the characters and situations, and what have they learned?  Have a Bible handy, and look up the relevant stories and verses after the show.  It will offer a direct blessing to your family as they grow in their knowledge of God.  If you will help spread the word to other families, and the programming really catches on, we can send a powerful message to “Hollywood” about the kind of shows we want for our children and families.  Be sure and pass on the word to others with young children, and maybe even pass along a word of thanks to the NBC execs.  By the way, don’t be surprised if you find yourself looking forward to Saturdays mornings - Veggie Tales are really a lot of fun!

Click here to read the full news release.

Apparently I coined a new term a few nights ago through a slip of the tongue.  After making some comments in my Bible study group, a couple of people immediately spoke up, saying they like my use of the term “storiented” in reference to our postmodern culture.  I didn’t really mean to say it - I guess I just ran “story” and “oriented” together a little, so it sounded like one word.  We moved on with our discussion of the Gospel of Mark, and I told them I wasn’t trying to sound clever.

I’ve thought about it several times since then and realized…we do live in a storiented culture.  Stories are very important to us.  They evoke deep emotion in our hearts.  A good story can prompt us to: laugh, cry, shout, believe, remember, imagine, hope, sympathize, blame, forgive, and so much more.  Stories open up other worlds of adventure and romance and possibility.  Wrongs are righted.  True love prevails.  Goodhearted heros triumph over sinister villains.  Problems are solved.  And relationships are restored.

Many of our entertainment choices are very storiented in nature.  We keep up with our favorite prime-time dramas or “reality” shows on TV.  We enter the story world of a good movie in a dark theater or the privacy of our own surround-sound entertainment room.  We lose ourselves in the unfolding narrative of a novel, biography, or other book.  Even music, videogames, and web surfing can be about connecting with a story larger than ourselves.  We love great stories, and we love to feel that we are, in some way, a part of them.

If approached properly, stories can inspire us to live better lives and build better relationships. (more…)

I have committed, along with a good friend, to regularly reading (and finishing!) good books.  I love acquiring good books, particularly ones that show promise in helping me grow in my walk with Christ and in my relationships with family and others.  Unfortunately, I often get no further than the first couple chapters (or even the front cover) before I set the book aside for a newer acquisition - or purely out of distraction.  Having the same pattern in his life, my buddy and I are setting forth on a new adventure together to read good books through to completion.  We will be reading Christian books of various kinds, classic literary works, and other books that we just happen to find appealing.  But with all this focus on books, I think it is touching something else in my life - something deeper.  It occurs to me that this is really about much more than reaching the back cover of a particular selection.  It is about self-discipline, a dedication to real personal growth, and persistence in staying focused on goals.  These are sometimes real struggles in my life - maybe you can relate.  And so I believe the impact of this reading journey will be much greater than becoming more widely read.  I expect to achieve greater self-discipline in other areas.  I anticipate becoming more focused on what matters and less distracted by things that don’t matter (TV, anyone?).  And I trust that in the process, I will be forging a strong friendship and brotherhood that will be a blessing to both of us and our households.

My encouragement to you - find out where you need to grow, find someone that is willing to grow with you, then do the work and rely on God every step of the way!

Click here (Three Year Reading Plan) for suggestions of some of the very best in Christian reading, according to a very distinguished panel of today’s top Christian leaders (as listed in David McKenna’s “How to Read a Christian Book.”)